


Fed Up

by Fly_Kitty7000



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Belly Expansion, Belly Rubs, Bodily Fluids, Bodily Functions, Comfort/Angst, Declarations Of Love, Developing Relationship, Disturbing Themes, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Fluff, Force-Feeding, Graphic Depictions of Illness, Graphic Description, Hurt/Comfort, Kidnapping, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Male Slash, Messy, Not Medically Correct, OOC, Out of Character, Physical Abuse, Pre-Slash, Psychological Torture, Torture, Vomiting, Weight Gain, request
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-24
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-04-27 20:49:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5063620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fly_Kitty7000/pseuds/Fly_Kitty7000
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the BAU team takes a case involving victims being tortured via force-feeding, Spencer suddenly finds himself the new object of their unsub's sick attention.  Will the team find him in time to save him?  And can any good come out of this terrible experience?</p><p>A/N: This is the result of a request from an anonymous reader (I have no idea who, but I hope the reader knows who he/she is lol) so I hope it is satisfactory :)  See beginning notes inside chapter 1 for more information.  Thanks!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Oh God...

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone. I know you're probably wondering why I'm posting a new story when I have so many left undone, but I got an anonymous request and who am I to deny the wants of my readers? The request went as follows:
> 
> "Hey! I was wondering if you could write a story for me. I'm looking for something in the CM universe involving slightly graphic force-feeding (I don't care to who) but ends with two of the members getting into a relationship. I'd prefer Moreid but I'm sure I'll like whatever you come up with! Thanks so much!"
> 
> So, anonymous reader (you know who you are), this is what I've come up with. I hope you like it and I'll try to update it as often as possible! Thanks for the request!
> 
> To everyone else, I really hope this isn't too disgusting or whatever lol and I hope I have a few fans. If not, at least I made one anonymous reader happy lol :D As always, I love comments and kudos!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of the characters therein. I just take them and do what I want with them (which is why they may read a little OOC even though I always try to keep each character's center, or what makes them the way they are, unless otherwise noted). If you don't like the story, please don't read it. All hateful comments or flames will be immediately deleted or marked as spam. I do, however, accept and welcome constructive criticism, opinions, and other comments as long as they are made in good taste. Thank you for reading and being respectful to me, as a human being, and my work in general. Please enjoy!

“Ok guys, we have a case in Santa Monica, California,” JJ said as she walked into the conference room and handed out case files to the members of the team sitting around the table. She then walked to the front of the room and used the projector remote to show pictures up on the big screen. “Three men so far have gone missing and have subsequently been found dead about a week after. Larry Steuben, age 25, Dennis Stoffer, age 27, and George Newcome, age 24. Notice the before, and then the after pictures.” She clicked the remote a few more times to put the after pictures up with the before pictures and a collective sound of surprise echoed through the room.

 

“Oh god,” Emily exclaimed as she wrinkled her nose in disgust. “What did this guy do to these men?”

 

The before pictures of the three men showed them all to be incredibly, almost unhealthily thin. The pictures of the men after they were found dead, however, showed their thin frames supporting large, bloated and swollen bellies that looked like round boulders sitting right under their skins.

 

“They’ve obviously been force-fed,” Spencer said, looking down at the file in his hands. “The autopsy reports show that each man had his stomach forcibly stretched, increasing the overall capacity. That probably happened over the course of the week in captivity. The cause of death in each victim looks like it most likely came from stomach rupture bleeds and suffocation. It looks as if, right before they were found, their stomachs were completely filled with liquefied food of some sort, causing the organs to rupture. But, even after that happened, they continued to be filled, which caused the abdomen to expand like that. The weight of the food would have pressed down on the lungs, thus causing the suffocation.”

 

“It also looks like they were pumped with Dramamine and some sort of paralytic so that they couldn’t vomit what they were given,” Derek added sadly, also looking at the case file. “Their throats were scraped and raw, so that means they probably were being fed through feeding tubes.”

 

“Alright, wheels up in 30,” Hotch said as he closed his file and stood up from the table. The room went into a frenzy as all the team members rushed to get ready for their flight.

 

* * *

 

 

By that night, the team had made almost no progress. Derek and Spencer were in their shared hotel room, Derek lounging on his bed and Spencer pacing up and down from the window to the door. He was restless, trying to think about what he was missing and what would help them catch their unsub.

 

“You’re gonna wear a hole in the carpet, pretty boy,” Derek said from the bed as he grabbed the TV remote and started flipping through channels. “Why don’t you lay down and get some rest.”

 

Spencer shook his head and said, “No I have too much energy to get any rest right now.” He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “I think I’m going to take a walk,” he said as he made his way toward the door.

 

“Alright, but don’t stay out too late,” Derek said, shaking his head in amusement. “We’ve got an early start tomorrow.”

 

“I won’t,” Spencer said absently as he walked out the door and into the hall. As he exited the building, he noticed that there was a chill in their air and vaguely wondered if he should have worn a jacket. He walked down the street, not really paying attention to where he was going. He ended up on the edge of the beach and he stopped to take in his surroundings, realizing how dark it really was with the sparse spacing of the streetlights this close to the ocean.

 

Spencer took a deep breath of the salty sea air and was thinking about returning to the hotel when something hard hit him on the back of the head. He fell forward into the cool sand and immediately blacked out.


	2. Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok short chapters, I know, but hopefully that'll allow me to update sooner than I update my other stories (hence me updating again a day after I posted the first chapter lol). Btw, this is the chapter where things start getting serious so I hope it's not too much. Let me know how I did (and anonymous, you know who you are, let me know if you like this!). Thanks everyone!

When Spencer woke up, he knew immediately that he was in trouble. He was in a large, dimly lit metal room and he vaguely wondered if it was a shipping container. He was laying on his back on a bed in the middle of the room, his arms strapped to the headboard above him and his legs strapped similarly to the footboard so that his body made a crude X. Spencer whimpered when he realized that there was a plastic tube taped to the side of his mouth that ran down his throat.

 

“Oh good, you’re awake,” a malicious voice said from the corner of the room.

 

Spencer jumped in surprise and turned his head to see a robust man in a jogging suit stride over to the bed with a sneer on his face. He whimpered again as the man reached down and touched Spencer’s abdomen, running his hand up and down the slightly concave surface covered by his button-down shirt.

 

“You skinny bastards are all the same,” the man said as he continued to stroke his hand in an almost soothing motion. “You strut down the street in your tight-fitting clothes and flaunt your flat stomachs in the faces of all us _normal_ people. Who cares if I’m a little overweight! There’s nothing wrong with it! But you people just continue to look at me in disgust and mock me as if having a thin body makes you superior and better than everyone else!” By the end of his speech, the man was yelling, spittle flying from his mouth and into Spencer’s face, and his gently stroking hand had raised to slap Spencer across the mouth.

 

Spencer yelped in pain and a few tears leaked out of his eyes as he violently shook his head no, trying to not only convey to the angry man that he wasn’t like what he’d just been accused of being like, but also silently begging not to be hurt.

 

It did no good, though, because the man walked away and came back moments later, wheeling in a large cylindrical container with a pump coming out of the top. “You’ll learn,” the man mumbled almost to himself as he put the container next to the bed and started hooking the tube coming out of Spencer’s mouth to the pump. “You won’t be able to taste this, so I’ll tell you what it is,” the man said to Spencer, a slightly maniacal look on his face. “This is a mixture of mostly liquefied cooked pork, finely chopped glazed doughnuts, vanilla ice cream, and pro-weight protein powder. Plenty of calories to just slide right down your pretty little throat. There’s also a fair amount of anti-nausea medication and some other things that will numb your stomach muscles so even if you _could_ throw up around the tube, you won’t be able to now.”

 

The man then switched on the pump and Spencer could feel the mixture being forced into his stomach. He started to panic and fight against his restraints, but it did no good. He was stuck and forced to watch his concave stomach slowly fill out, like a balloon being inflated. The pressure in his stomach grew as it continued to distend uncomfortably. He distinctly felt his clothes getting tighter, his pants digging into the bottom of his swollen stomach while openings started to appear between the buttons of his shirt, showing that his pale skin was turning red and slightly glossy from being stretched.

 

The man switched the machine off before Spencer’s stomach started bursting the buttons on his shirt, then he walked over to admire his work. He again ran his hand over Spencer’s stomach, which made Spencer moan in pain, his stretched skin extremely sensitive. “You look so much better with a little weight on you,” the man said almost lovingly and then smacked his hand on Spencer’s food-hard belly.

 

Spencer whimpered and then burped around the feeding tube, blushing in embarrassment. His belly was so heavy sitting on him that he was having a hard time breathing, but all he could do was whimper and softly sob, tears streaming down his cheeks.

 

The man gently rubbed Spencer’s belly once more before he said, “We’re done for now. Get some rest. You’ll need it.” He then turned around and walked away.

 

Spencer heard a door open, close, and then lock, but he was too distressed to notice where in the room the door was located. Everything just hurt so badly. And he felt so _full!_ He heard and felt his stomach roll and gurgle as it tried to digest the massive amount that had been shoved into it. Suddenly, however, Spencer just didn’t have enough energy to think anymore and he felt his eyes slide shut as his body descend into a restless sleep.


	3. To The Brim

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone. I know that most people are waiting for other stories to be updated, but I'm still trying to revive my creative spark. I'll try not to take too long :) As for this one, I already had a few more chapters written, but I'd sort of forgotten about them since this story isn't as popular. However, I recently saw some kudos on it, which reminded me that I should update it, so that's what I'm doing. I hope that at least some people are enjoying this story :) Thanks for having patience with me and I hope you like this chapter!

The next few days went in a blur of pain and humiliation for Spencer. He no longer paid attention to the man’s rants and snide remarks telling him that everything that happened, every time he was filled to the brim, every time he was forced to mess in his pants and just lay in that mess, was all his fault for being so skinny in the first place.

 

Each day that passed, Spencer noticed his belly growing bigger and bigger during feeding times and deflating less and less after digestion. He didn’t know how long he’d been in the man’s captivity and forced to endure the unimaginable torture of being forcibly stretched and expanded, but he didn’t think that he would be able to survive very much longer.

 

He was staring morosely down at his rounded abdomen, not yet gone flabby from the fat being packed on him in such a short amount of time, and realized that he’d probably gained at least 6 inches if not more to his waistline. His clothes felt uncomfortably tight and he wished he could at least unbutton his pants to relieve some of the pressure.

 

He heard the door to the room open, the hinges creaking loudly, and Spencer whimpered and started to hyperventilate, knowing what was coming next. He saw the man wheeling in another cylindrical container and Spencer just didn’t know if he could stand another round of the feeding torture.

 

The man walked over to the bed and glared down at Spencer, an angry sneer covering his face. “You think you’re so great, don’t you…” he stated with malice, disgust just dripping from his words. “Well maybe this will teach you… but I doubt it. People like you just don’t learn…” He slowly shook his head and then spit in Spencer’s face.

 

Spencer cringed and whimpered around the tube that had remained in his throat through his captivity. He blinked a few times as tears started running down his face. He was going to die today. He just knew it. He started sobbing as the man switched out the containers and hooked the feeding tube pump on to the new one.

 

Suddenly, Spencer heard the sweetest sound he had ever heard in his entire life. The door to the room banged open violently and he could hear Derek shout, “FBI put your hands in the air!”

 

Spencer moaned out in relief, but that relief was short-lived when the man reached over and turned the pump on full blast. “Step back or he dies!” the man shouted at the BAU team and local police officers that had filled the room.

 

Spencer whimpered and made little terrified noises as he watched his stomach balloon outwards at a frightening rate. His eyes grew wide and he stopped paying attention to the room around him when he felt his belly pushing painfully against his clothes. Suddenly, button after button on his overtaxed shirt began popping off and flying around the room, separating the shirt to allow his swollen abdomen to spring forth. The skin was taut, red and angry from overexertion, and he started to break out in a sweat.

 

The pressure inside him was almost unbearable as he felt his stomach slosh, gurgle, and groan, trying to keep up with what was being forced into him. Suddenly, he felt the button on his pants give and pop off and the zipper come undone, further releasing his belly out into the open. Spencer moaned at the relief in pressure, but it was momentary as he continued to be filled.

 

There was just so much pain that he couldn’t imagine it getting any worse, but he was abruptly proven wrong as a sharp stabbing and ripping pain resounded through his abdomen. He cried out from around the tube and saw his belly spring out a few more inches. He knew that his stomach had ruptured and the tube was now just filling the space around his organs, causing more pain to shoot through him.

 

In another moment, he felt the pump being shut off, but he was in so much pain that he could barely think about what that might mean. He didn’t have to wonder long though when he saw his team crowding around the bed, all looking down at him with worry and concern written all over their faces.


	4. Just When He Thought It Couldn't Get Any Worse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Like I said in the last chapter, I already had a few chapters written and I just didn't think to update the story since it isn't too popular until I saw some recent kudos on it. Therefore, the few readers who are hopefully enjoying this story get a lot of updates in the same day! Yay! Lol well, I hope that you enjoy this :)

Spencer felt the tube being slowly pulled from his throat and tasted blood and bile when it was finally free. He coughed and gasped for breath while blood, spit, and bile sprayed out of his mouth and leaked down out of the corners of his lips. His hands and legs were released, but he was so weak and distressed that he didn’t think he could move anyway.

 

Spencer felt strong arms slowly lift him into a semi-seated position, which made it easier for him to breathe but at the same time caused more pain to shoot through his belly as it was jostled slightly. He cried out as best as he could from his hoarse throat and screwed his eyes shut.

 

Suddenly, he felt a warm hand start to gently stroke and massage his bloated and swollen belly and he heard soft words being spoken into his ear. “Shhh… it’s alright, pretty boy… just relax… an ambulance will be here soon… just hold on and it’ll be ok.”

 

Spencer opened his eyes and looked over at Derek, who was supporting his back with one hand and rubbing his stomach with the other hand. He suddenly seemed to come back to his senses and realized that his whole team was looking at him and that Derek was touching him. He blushed in extreme embarrassment and tried to pull away from Derek’s hands, but he could barely move.

 

Spencer let out a soft sob and hiccupped, bringing up more blood and bile. “Don’t look at me,” he whispered and the room seemed to go quiet as his friends’ faces grew darker with concern over their teammate.

 

“Shhh… it’s going to be ok,” Derek soothed again, continuing to rub and massage Spencer’s distended and sore belly.

 

“Don’t look at me!” he cried as loud as he could, but instinctively leaned over into Derek’s almost-embrace and soothing ministrations.

 

Derek continued to rub and massage the hard, groaning and grumbling mass that was Spencer’s belly, causing Spencer to let out a loud belch of gas along with what little his body could vomit with the numb, almost paralyzed muscles of his esophagus.

 

Spencer’s face turned a darker shade of red as thick bile, partially digested food, and blood flowed from his mouth. He whimpered and hid his face in Derek’s shoulder. He couldn’t deny the slight relief that the release of gas and vomit had granted him, but he really couldn’t imagine his situation getting any more embarrassing.

 

Oh, how he was wrong! Spencer felt a sudden pressure in his lower abdomen as Derek’s hand slowly helped with whatever his body could digest with a ruptured stomach. He started to quiver, shake, and sob as he felt a familiar feeling course through him. He couldn’t stop the loud, hard burst of flatulence that erupted from his rear end and, as he felt warmth spreading from him, he knew he had defecated himself.

 

Spencer only sobbed harder when he hiccupped and burped once more, spewing vomit and blood all over Derek’s shoulder.

 

No one made any comments on Spencer’s embarrassing situation, though, and Derek only held him closer, continuing to soothe and comfort him as much as possible until the ambulance arrived.


	5. You Saw...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Like I said in the last chapter, I already had a few chapters written and I just didn't think to update the story since it isn't too popular until I saw some recent kudos on it. Therefore, the few readers who are hopefully enjoying this story get a lot of updates in the same day! Yay! Lol well, I hope that you enjoy this :) Also, especially for this chapter, remember that I am not a doctor so little if any of the medical information is probably correct. Sorry if this gets in the way of some readers' enjoyment. Just try to suspend disbelief for a while and it'll all be ok lol :D
> 
> AO3 also apparently took the line break button out (which is stupid I think), so I did my best. I hope nothing is confusing!

The waiting room was silent and the atmosphere thick with worry and tension as the BAU team waited for news on their injured colleague. They were all still in shock over the way they had found Spencer. Considering the case, they had known, as soon as he had come up missing, that it was a distinct possibility he was being tortured by their unsub, but it was still hard to see someone they knew and loved so hurt and damaged.

 

The silence was broken by a doctor walking in wearing bloody scrubs. “Spencer Reid family?” he asked in a tired voice, but seemed slightly surprised when the whole team stood up and rushed to him. He shrugged slightly and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Ok, my name is Dr. Alvin Schmidt and I’m in charge of Spencer’s care while he’s here. Spencer came in with a ruptured stomach which subsequently leaked the contents out into his abdomen. We repaired the organ with a skin-patch that should grow right into the lining as it heals. We also pumped and sucked out all the excess waste and accumulated fat that was surrounding his organs. However, it appears that the skin around his abdomen was stretched rapidly so he’ll most likely experience some sagging in that area. He’s young, though, so the skin should firm up again fairly quickly. Since the surgery was major, he won’t be able to eat solid food until his stomach completely heals, which could take up to a few months provided that an infection doesn’t set in.”

 

Dr. Schmidt took a deep breath and cleared his throat before he continued in his summary of the young genius’s injuries. “Spencer also has a severe rash on his buttock and genital regions that resembles a… well, a really bad diaper rash. He’ll need to keep the area clean and dry keep it from getting infected and I’ll prescribe a medicated lotion that’ll help to keep him comfortable as soon as he’s ready to be discharged. If he does this, the rash should heal in a few weeks’ time. Overall, I have confidence that he’ll make a complete recovery physically. Mentally may be another story.”

                   

The tension in the room suddenly rushed out as everyone breathed a sigh of relief. Even with the doctor’s last comment hanging over their heads, they were all just overwhelmingly glad that their friend and colleague was alive.

 

“Can we see him?” Derek asked, his voice a little thick with emotion.

 

“Yes, I’ll have a nurse lead you up to his room. He’s still unconscious from the anesthesia, but he should be waking up soon,” the doctor said, sounding exhausted as he waved a nurse over to them. “Just don’t agitate him. He needs to stay calm and rest.”

 

Everyone nodded and followed the nurse up to Spencer’s room. A silence fell over them once more as they all crowded in and sat in various seats around the room. They had been assured that Spencer was going to be ok physically, but his mental state was another matter altogether. They just hoped that they could help him through this.

 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Spencer woke up and whimpered, slightly disoriented and dizzy. He heard a shifting in the room and felt someone take his hand, causing him to flinch slightly. He looked over and saw Derek sitting in a chair beside his bed, staring down at him, a sad little smile on his face. “Hey there, pretty boy,” he said gently as he brought his other hand up to rub up and down Spencer’s arm soothingly. “How are you feeling?”

 

“Where am I?” he croaked out and then winced at the pain in his throat.

 

“Here,” he heard a voice from the other side of the bed say. He slowly turned his head toward the voice and saw JJ holding a cup of water with a straw sticking out of it. “Small sips,” she said as she held it out to him.

 

“You’re at the hospital,” Derek said gently as Spencer sipped the water, which was cooling to his throat but landed painfully in his stomach.

 

He scrunched his face up in pain as the water settled inside of him. Suddenly reminded of why he would be in the hospital in the first place, he gasped and opened his eyes, looking down at his now mostly flat abdomen. He started to move his hand down to feel his stomach to make sure he wasn’t hallucinating or anything, but JJ caught his hand and held it between both of her own.

 

“You just had major surgery, Spence,” she said softly, stroking his hand soothingly. “You shouldn’t touch your bandages until you heal a little more.”

 

He stared at her for a moment, not answering or really moving at all. He eventually let his gaze wander around the room and found the whole team there, even Garcia, and they were all just staring at him with mixtures of concern and relief on each of their faces. Spencer blushed and looked down, not feeling like looking at anyone at the moment.

 

Spencer started sniffing and tears threatened to leak out of his eyes when he remembered that they’d all seen him with a giant, bloated belly. They’d all seen him vomit and defecate all over himself. How could he look at them? How could he even stand to be around them anymore?!

 

Derek could see him becoming more and more distressed and so tried to calm him down. “Hey, it’s going to be ok… everything is ok now… you’re safe, the unsub is dead, and you’re going to make a full recovery… it’s all ok.”

 

Spencer whimpered and closed his eyes as he allowed the tears to flow free. “You saw,” he whispered hopelessly. “You saw… you saw… you saw…”


	6. Beginning to Heal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Like I said in the last chapter, I already had a few chapters written and I just didn't think to update the story since it isn't too popular until I saw some recent kudos on it. Therefore, the few readers who are hopefully enjoying this story get a lot of updates in the same day! Yay! Lol well, I hope that you enjoy this :)
> 
> AO3 also apparently took the line break button out (which is stupid I think), so I did my best. I hope nothing is confusing!

Derek and JJ tried to calm Spencer down as he continued to chant, “You saw,” under his breath faster and faster and began to rock his body back and forth at an almost violent pace. The rest of the team stared on in shock and concern and began to become afraid that Spencer would end up ripping out his stitches or causing himself some other bodily harm.

 

Before anyone else could think how to help, however, Derek maneuvered himself so that he was sitting on the edge of the hospital bed facing Spencer. He then grabbed both of Spencer’s shoulders, abruptly halting Spencer’s movements and words, and ducked his head slightly so that he was at eye-level with the traumatized young man. “Look at me, pretty boy,” he said firmly, wanting Spencer to meet his eyes to make sure that the genius was paying attention. “Look at me.”

 

Spencer reluctantly lifted his gaze to meet Derek’s, flinching a little at the intensity in them but keeping his gaze there nonetheless.

 

Derek sighed and gave Spencer a small smile. “Yes, we did see,” he said slowly, never breaking eye contact. “But what we saw was a friend and loved one being brutally tortured and humiliated. Nothing more, nothing less. And you know what we’re all thinking about right now? We’re thinking about how we can help you heal, how we can help you feel like yourself again, and how we can help you move past this. That’s it.”

 

Spencer felt his lower lip start to quiver as he continued to stare at Derek. “You’re not lying?” he asked softly, a few tears running down his face.

 

“I wouldn’t lie to you, pretty boy,” Derek answered gently with another small smile. He then brushed Spencer’s hair out of his face and pulled him in for a hug.

 

Spencer completely lost any composure he had left at that gesture and he broke down into heaving sobs, crying hysterically. “It just hurt so _bad_!” he wailed as each of his words turned into sobs, coughs, and whimpers. “He told me it was all my fault… that I deserved everything he did to me… and he just kept yelling at me and telling me what a horrible person I was! I just feel so disgusting!”

 

“Shhh…” Derek comforted as he rubbed up and down Spencer’s back. The other members of the team had gathered closer and were also trying to soothe him by touching and caressing his legs and arms. “None of this was your fault and no one deserves what he did to you… it’s all going to be ok… we’re going to help you through this…”

 

The team continued their soothing ministrations and Derek continued to hug and gently talk to Spencer until the young man fell asleep in Derek’s embrace. Derek gently laid Spencer back down on the bed, brushed his hair out of his face, and then leaned down to kiss him on the forehead. “It’s all going to be ok,” he whispered as he sat back down and took Spencer’s hand in his own once more.

 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

When Spencer woke up again, he found the room almost empty of people. Only Derek was still by his side, sleeping in a chair off to his left. Spencer shifted himself and tried to sit up straighter, but a pain shot through his stomach making him gasp and moan.

 

Derek immediately woke up at the sounds of Spencer’s distress and leaned forward to grab his hand. “Hey, what’s wrong? What hurts?” he asked in a concerned voice, his eyebrows scrunched together until they were almost touching in the middle of his forehead.

 

“I tried… to sit up… pain… in my stomach,” Spencer answered through gasping breaths, trying to calm himself and make the pain go away.

 

“Do you want a stronger pain medication?” Derek asked slowly, knowing how Spencer felt about medications in general, but needing to ask just in case. “Right now, they have you on Ketorolac, but I can ask about something else.”

 

Spencer shook his head violently and whimpered out, “No, no… I’ll be fine… just need a minute.”

 

Derek nodded and rubbed Spencer’s hand with both of his own until Spencer relaxed, the pain finally receding. “Do you want me to set the bed up a little for you?”

 

Spencer nodded and lazily blinked his eyes, exhausted by the pain that had shot through him. He slowly felt his back rise up into more of a sitting position as Derek pressed a button on the hospital bed. “Thanks,” he softly said as he slowly turned his head to stare at his teammate.


	7. More Than Just Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! This is the last completed chapter I have for now so I hope all the updates was enough to make up for the long period of silence. And I'm happy to end on a fluffy note for today. The story needed some fluff to break up all the tension lol :) I hope that whoever is still interested in this story enjoys this chapter and thanks for reading! :D

Derek smiled at Spencer and sat back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. He suddenly looked nervous as he crossed his legs and licked his lips.

 

Spencer scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion and concern, wondering what on Earth could have happened that would make Derek act like that. “What’s wrong?” he asked in a small voice, not really sure if he wanted to know or not.

 

Derek jumped slightly, obviously not realizing that his posture or attitude had changed. He sighed and uncrossed his legs and arms, leaning forward once more to take Spencer’s hand in his. “Nothing is wrong,” he said softly as he massaged Spencer’s hand with his thumbs. “I just… when you disappeared, I was so scared. I was angry that someone had dared to take you and hurt you… And when we found you… I just… I just realized how much it would hurt if you weren’t in my life anymore… I realized how much you mean to me.”

 

Spencer watched Derek’s eyes go soft as he stared at him and noticed how soothing Derek’s hands were on his skin. But he was still slightly confused at Derek’s words. “What do you mean? I don’t understand,” he said softly as he licked his lips nervously.

 

“I just want you in my life, Spencer,” Derek said sincerely, making sure to keep eye contact in order to show Spencer how serious he was. “No matter the capacity, I always want you in my life. I would like us to be more than just coworkers, more than just friends. But there’s no pressure here, ok? No matter what happens, I will always be here for you.”

 

Spencer blinked a few times, not really comprehending what Derek had just told him. Why in the Hell would someone like Derek want to be with someone like _him_?! “Are you serious?” he asked a little skeptically, expecting Derek to suddenly exclaim something like “April Fools!” and then laugh at him.

 

“I wouldn’t kid you about something like that,” Derek said patiently, knowing that Spencer had serious self-esteem and self-confidence issues anyway and that his recent captivity would not have helped those issues.

 

Spencer took a deep breath, but then nodded his head. “Ok,” he said softly as he bit his bottom lip nervously.

 

“Ok what?” Derek asked, not wanting to assume anything.

 

Spencer licked his lips and said, a little more confidently, “Ok, we can try… to be more than friends.” He then sighed and smiled slightly, just staring at Derek who looked to be overjoyed at his statement. “I can’t promise you anything,” he added softly, breaking eye contact to look down at his and Derek’s intertwined hands. “I can’t promise you that I’m going to be ok. I can’t promise that I won’t make mistakes. I have almost no experience to draw upon when it comes to things like this… and now I’m even more damaged than I was before… I just… well, I just don’t know what you see in me.”

 

“Spencer, you are _not_ damaged,” Derek said firmly, squeezing Spencer’s hand for emphasis. “You’ve been hurt, yes, but you’re going to be ok. You’re stronger than anyone I’ve ever met and you can overcome this. You are a kind, self-sacrificing, beautiful man and it hurts me every time I see you putting yourself down. You deserve more love and happiness than any of us and I want to give that to you, if I can… if you’ll let me try.”

 

Spencer had tears streaming down his face by the time Derek was done speaking. He couldn’t believe all the wonderful things he was saying about him! How could Derek see all that in him, when all Spencer could see was damaged goods?

 

Not even thinking about it, Spencer tugged on Derek’s hand to get him to come closer. Derek obliged and moved to sit on the edge of Spencer’s bed to pull him into yet another hug.

 

Spencer’s breath was hitching and he was trying not to start sobbing, but Derek’s arms around him and his hand rubbing up and down Spencer’s back just felt so good that he thought he may cry out of pure happiness and contentment.


End file.
